I Again Disappointed Myself And You…Sorry
Posted on May 03, 2010I could not write from past two days. Time and laziness can be a dangerous combination to deal with sometimes. I had been sitting all day in front of this computer screen doing something or the other. I got an awful hearing from boss. (Boss, If you are planning it to read it till the end, then don’t do that . All of it has you today). I am disappointed. Disappointed at my own self. He kept yelling at me and I was scared. But then, his few words kind of gave me a big blow. He said,” you disappointed me. Do you realize. I am disappointed”. and they were such harsh words. I could have thought of writing something else. But, this just wont go out of my mind. I swear I don’t want boss to read this. But I have to write today and
Yup, This Is Excactly How My Face Looks Right Now
I don’t have a second thought running in my mind besides this. I love working and probably this is the most interesting thing ever. He did misinterpret some of my actions in a wrong way, which again made me feel very bad. I am not sweet to you intentionally Goddammit! I gain nothing by working with you except knowledge and that is primarily my only concern. I have 10,000 ways to making people work in my favor. But, this is what you thought of me!!!! That I am writing those one liners to make you deal sweetly with me!!! Two days and you judged me THIS!!! Yes, obviously my fault I could not keep you updated.
But, how could you think I am a lazy person who does not work. I don’t like to discuss my same bloody problem again n again n again. That is the reason I don’t talk to you about it. I get scared of you and avoid telling you. Don’t you tell me that I am being lazy and incapable of showing good results. Trust me I don’t care what image people make about me, but when I am working sincerely, grasping knowledge then I don’t take this shit! I know you were not wrong and get lost if you think writing this is again a way of gaining you back in the favor department. I have worked, and never for you but for myself. If you think these one liners are to impress you then you are mistaken.
How can you possibly think I have issues with commitment! Besides my ex-boyfriend I have never had issues of commitment with anyone else. Okay, you are right and your scolding was fair, but you cannot possibly stop being nice to me if I was careless for two days. Did I stop talking to you when never reverted back for two days? Yes, you are the boss but, lets be fair na. I don’t like sharing my problem again and again and I don’t like rehearsing it. I find it embarrassing. So I cannot tell you every time. This is not a bloody fuckin love letter. And I really give a damn if People find this pure shit! It just hurts when you yourself end up like an ass and on top of it you are misunderstood by someone you respect so much.
But this is the fact. last time boss
I will Still adore you….
P S. You Forgot My Birthday 
I Am Not ‘THAT’ weak!!!!
Posted on April 17, 2010Boss, I am feeling so low today because of you.I just felt as if I portraying myself so wrong and weak.Everyone is weak at some point of their lives right?So am I.Yes, I am a very emotional person but not a dumb stupid girl in love.So what if I am most of the time babbling about HIM?He is a very important part of my life and as a result i have many thoughts that are dedicated to hhim.But, no where does it mean than I am a ‘dumb blond’.
That's me when I am frustrated
I have been thinking about this from sometime now.I mean a few hours.Is this the kind of impression I am giving people?That, i am a total lovy-dovy girl who is 24×7 crying about this one man who does not love her?If that is the case then, I think I need some serious human revolution(changing oneself for the better). I am someone who is socially aware.Like any other girl I am interested in having fun,flirting and hanging out with friend.Although I am not exactly a typical girl when it comes down to shopping,make up and fashion but ya, in a larger way I am a serious person at some ends.The difference is I am not inclined towards making everyone realize this,by talking very seriously and not laughing much.Bring a some serious stuff and I deal accordingly.Don’t like what I am writing right now but, I am feeling bad .It’s been a number of times that I am made to feel that because I take things easily and all the time I am laughing,dancing around and giggling I am not that ’serious in nature and cannot handle responsibility.
This is pure shit!I cannot change myself into a zombie to make people feel that i deal with my life seriously.HUH! And I hate pinky pinky stuff around me….Too girly for me and does not even suit my personality.I am ruled by emotions but, not all the time!I am in love bit that does not make me a ‘HIM addict’!
It is bad to see that you are not respected just because you laugh at things you find funny.
(All of it is not for you boss.I still adore you).
Damb, stupid misconceptions…..
I Am Not Mad…I Am Just In Love!
Posted on April 12, 2010Okay, i think the guy i mentioned about who is too busy to pick up the call, kinda took it seriously. I am not able to contact him from past good 20hrs. I had to ask him how this whole writing thing is turning out. But, it seems he is again BUSY!Ggrrhhh….any ways i have finished reading this novel ‘RIGHT FIT, WRONG SHOE’. It is typical bollywood style but, i liked it. All the girls..if you will read it you, will know what i mean,and for all those who are simply not bothered. Aditya Sarin!The male protagonist of the novel is simply YUM!!!Trust me, I couldn’t help writing a mail to the author asking her, if she actually knew such a character in person. I mean…he is smart, bold, RICH(Yesss!) Full of romance and much more. He is everything you and I dreams about. I have fallen head over heals. Actually, every time I read it only one image flashes in my mind.The guy whom I am madly in love with.Perhaps this is why i like Aditya Sarin so much.He reminds me of ‘HIM’…My guy.I wonder how he will perceive all these thoughts of mine.It’s been a while since i spoke to him.When i was a little too young, or may be at an age where questions like,’what is love?’ start popping out, i always wondered about this one this. People say that when you are in love you see your beloved every where. The idea of it appeared berserk to me. Honestly!I thoought how can you get confused with someone.s face?
But NOW I know! You see him every where because you want to see him around all the time.You expect magic to happen and have him in front of you . Even if it means just having the opportunity to absentmindedly stare at him.It means so much. Now it does not look strange to me when i see his face in the ice cream wala opposite my house.heheh…(I hope he does not get to read this)So, if you are in love and you are doing silly stuff, don’t worry.It is a very beautiful feeling(painful as well.i agree) But just let this feeling be with you. You are lucky to be in love…Enjoy it.
